Watcher

Two days ago I walked on the streets with fear ethier I belong in here. I felt like being a part of this place. I wanted to be involved in these peoples lifes. I was also scared to be treated the way I don`t want to be treated.

Two days ago I saw some stunning church with a little yard. I walked inside the yard. The trees in the yard were huge. There were few graves with a big crosses. They were old and looked magnificent. I looked around. I saw the way to get inside the church.

I got closer to the entrance with a high and wide wood door. Behind that door there were a woman inside. She was still. I could not see her properly, but she didn`t move and stared through the door`s glass. And she stared at me. I tried to take my time by watching some event advertisements on the wall. In a while I looked back but she was still there. She was still watching me. I steped back and decided to leave this place. I was threatened.

I went out of the church`s yard. 

In about a minute I steped again in the church`s properties. I was with all my body and mind inside that forbidden place. I found the other door to get inside. I opened it whatever could happen to me. The woman was just behind the door. She smiled and said:

”I was waiting for you to get in.”

Soil

By squeezing soil in the yard I was thinking about it’s power. The power of growing and giving a  new life.

And I suddenly realized something. I found the way of taking my fears under control. I have to connect to the sounds of nature. And I squeezed the soil more and more. I gently touched the plants. I smelled them deeply. They have such a mystical smell! I seat on the chair under the grapes and watched the sun.

My body is getting warm. My mind is filling up with all the smells from the yard.

I am on my way to find myself from the parks, gardens and benches.